Weathering Seasons of Change

“I will bless My people and their homes around My holy hill. And in the proper season I will send the showers they need. There will be showers of blessing.” ~ Ezekiel 34-26

“There shall be showers of blessing; this is the promise of love; there shall be seasons refreshing, sent from the Savior above. Showers of blessing, showers of blessing we need; Mercy drops ‘round us are falling, but for the showers we plead.” ~ There Shall Be Showers of Blessing ~ Baptist Hymnal 1956

“To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under Heaven.”

~ Ecclesiastes 3:1

“To everything, turn, turn, turn,

There is a season, turn, turn, turn,

And a time to every purpose under Heaven”

Turn, Turn, Turn Lyrics – The Byrds ~ 1965

 

In the mid-1960’s the folk-rock group, The Byrds, made popular a song whose lyrics were taken almost verbatim from the Bible from the book of Ecclesiastes, King James Version, although the sequence was rearranged to fit the melody. When I hear it, I think of seasons of life…past, present and to come…and I reflect on what I’ve learned.

Autumn is my favorite season and we are in the throes of its beginning for this current year. I’m not exactly sure why it’s become my favorite over the years, but it has. In fact, for me, there’s something fascinating about the changing of every season that causes me to sit up and take notice. I suppose that Winter into Spring, the shedding of dormancy into new life, is the most obvious seasonal change. After all, what compares to new beginnings and rebirth? Less apparent I think, but not less important, is the morphing of Spring into Summer. This continues the growing season, the time we take advantage of light and warmth to prepare for the colder months ahead. These are the lazy, hazy days of Summer-fun coupled with rest and relaxation; in a very real way, the calm before the storm. We plan, plant, water and nurture, day after day and week after week. We know if we are diligent, a harvest of bounty awaits us at the changing of yet another season, one in which we’ll need the fruits of our Summer labor to carry us through, to sustain us when life is colder, darker, more bleak…a time when it’s up to us to lean on and utilize the provisions with which we’ve been blessed. Whether a harvest of fruits and vegetables ready for preserving, or the blessing of strength and health that permits us to work so we can be warm in winter: Cutting wood for fire, knitting or stitching warm blankets and clothes, or the good health to attend to the work of our employer or business for steady income. After laboring comes our harvest, the yield of blessings we reap from sowing and nurturing during those prior seasons of growth.

But “therein lies the rub,” a common phrase reminds us. We have to “make hay while the sun shines” another admonishes. The opportunity to care for ourselves, being good stewards of our resources, may pass us by if we’re not careful to take action. I don’t know about you, but in my depressed (and often anxious) state, this is much easier said than done.

So that is the topic that concerns me today; how do we transition during the changing seasons and circumstances of life? Right now I’m doing what is called “writing in process.” It means I don’t have it all figured out and I’m not exactly sure where my words will take me. I’m thinking and writing concurrently. I know there is something deep down that I need to figure out for myself, and maybe help you along the way, but I don’t have the answers just yet. So I’m talking to you as I type, hoping that will help, the way chatting with old friends and baring our souls often leads to seeing challenges in a new light or helps us begin to understand something that, until now, has escaped us.

Fall is a slow fade into dormancy…not death, but dormancy. And in times of hardship, that’s the hope because dormancy doesn’t last forever. It will pass. But for now…there’s a meme that floats around social media this time of year that declares, “autumn is about to show us how beautiful it is to let things go.” I don’t know the origins of this phrase, but it is usually accompanied with photos of falling leaves of yellow, orange and red, some being tossed by the wind and others laying in piles beneath barren trees. And every time I scroll across these words, I find myself in awe. It’s such a simple, yet profound truth. And isn’t that the way truth is? It sometimes eludes us, even for long periods of time because maybe, just maybe, we make it too hard. We rack our brains trying to wrap our mind around life’s circumstances, and try as we might, there often seems to be no answer.

Then suddenly it’s there.

Maybe not a complete answer, but a beginning…somewhere to start.

Let go…

The simple thought crosses our mind. It’s like a whisper, but from where?  And there is a subtle “knowing” deep in our soul.  “Your ears shall hear a word behind you saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.” (Isaiah 30:21)

Let it go…

There it is again, a little more emphatically. You feel the muscles in your hands relax as they loosen their grip. You breath quickens and you hear the gentle rustle of the air, as that thing you’ve held tightly to for so long wafts to the ground. Your heart races as it surrenders to change. When that thing…that stubbornly held belief, or the insistence of control over something no longer yours, the toxic habit that was never good for you, or the relationship long since dead…when it hits the ground there isn’t a thud. Instead there’s a silence; a peace and a lightness you haven’t known in…forever.

For a second you consider picking it up again because you think it’s so much a part of you. But is it? There is a feeling of loss, and perhaps of being lost, at least for the moment. You wonder how you’ll survive. You (we)…we’ve never dropped it before…we’ve never been without it, so how do we fill the gaping hole? Maybe the better question is, should we?

Part of living is sometimes letting go of things that no longer serve us, or aren’t useful in our present season, and fear is often at the root of what keeps us clinging. Changes occur outside of our choosing or doing, and it becomes necessary to adjust. Life shifts and we are challenged. Do we shift with the changes, or do we take another path? Or do we paralyze ourselves, as I sometimes do, with the fear of change and take no action at all?

Following the above referenced scripture, Ecclesiastes 3:1, come these words of truth written by King Solomon:

“There is…

     A time to be born and a time to die;

     A time to plant and a time to reap;

     A time to kill and a time to heal;

     A time to teardown and a time to build;

     A time to weep and a time to laugh;

     A time to mourn and a time to dance;

     A time to cast away stones and a time to gather stones;

     A time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;

     A time to gain and a time to lose;

     A time to keep and a time to throw away;

     A time to tear and a time to sew;

     A time to be quiet and a time to speak up;

     A time to love and a time to hate;

     A time for war and a time for peace.”

Two verses later Solomon declares, “He has made everything beautiful in its own time.” (Ecc 3:11)  And isn’t that the key? “In its own time” means there is probably some waiting involved, and if we are honest, waiting is a word that seems almost torturous. Transition requires patience and that might feel worse than the circumstance itself. Yet that’s where real change happens: in the season. Later, we realize we’ve grown, we’re stronger. We weathered the season well, so to speak, and we’re better for it.

That’s the harvest.

I think most of us are familiar with the stages of grief described and defined by Elizabeth Kubler Ross: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. For me, the changing seasons of our natural world, and the changing times and seasons of our lives, can feel a little like the cycle of grief: birth (spring), growing in wisdom (summer), dispensing wisdom (autumn), and completely letting go (winter).

Speaking for myself, I’m in the autumn of my life. And that can feel sad and joyful at the same time. From the turning of Summer-green into splashes of yellow, orange and red, and from its bountiful harvest to its cooling temperatures…the seasons give, and they take away. And it is all beautiful in its own, appropriate time. God promises it. There’s no such thing as living this life and not experiencing change. I’ll be the first to admit that I like my comfort zones. I don’t adjust to new circumstances easily. As far back as I can remember, my insides resisted new things on the horizon: first day of Kindergarten, first Sunday in the new (older) Sunday School class, and one of my personal favorites, routinely hiding under the kitchen table like a frightened cat when guests visited our home (yes, I did this).

Fast forward to my older childhood and teen years; I attended school because I had to, but for the most part I chose not to participate in extra-curricular activities because they were “new,” and “different,” and “what if?” What if it all went wrong? What if I had no talent? What if I was rejected? Yes, all of that was possible. But as I grew older I also learned I was missing out, because what if I had fun? What if I made a new friend? What if I discovered something new and different that I liked? Or even loved? Or the opposite; what if there was something I might love and excel in, but would never know for fear of the ever-changing seasons of life?

Opportunities, experiences…seasons. They all matter. It matters that we venture out of the various comfort zones of one season and continue to live the life we’ve been given in another season, because this physical life here and now doesn’t go on forever. “And we know that God causes everything to work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them” (Romans 8:28). Note that it doesn’t say that all things are good…because all things in this life are clearly not good. But the promise is that everything will work out for good, in His time and His way, for those who love God.

For me, it’s been a long road traveling both blessed and sorrowful seasons. We all have, because that’s the thing about life. Yet, we’re surviving. I’ve climbed in (and back out of) the dark pit of depression, only to fall back in again at another time. I’ve railed against grief and contended with anxiety for more than half my life. I’ve fought this fight until it seemed there was no fight left in me. Thankfully my body knew what my stubborn mind refused to give into: it needed rest and I needed to let go and loosen the tight grip of control I thought I should have over life’s circumstances. Three score of my life has been spent living for should: trying to please certain people who long ago demonstrated they weren’t worthy of any more of my “shoulds.” Dear one, I have learned that should is ok some of the time. Should is even the hands-down right thing some of the time. But “should” should never be the default setting for every decision we make in this life and in our relationships with others. Depending on the season we are in, and who we are in it with, there are times to say yes, but also times we must say an emphatic no! And then, on top of it all, our seasons are going to change. They just will. They won’t ask for permission, nor will they alter their timetable to accommodate our schedule, our preferences, or are emotions. We have to learn to be discerning with our time and energy. Both are a limited resource and God calls us to be good stewards of all that He has blessed us with. He doesn’t want us to waste, but He doesn’t want us to wear out prematurely, either. There is a time for every season under heaven. And that includes working when it’s time to work, making hay while the sun shines so to speak, but also resting when it’s time to rest so we can enjoy the fruits of our labor and replenish our store of energy. The very One who set an example for us by entering into a time of rest after the process of creation was complete, wants us to follow His lead and rest after a period of labor, stress or hardship.

Friend, if you find you’re in a season of change, and the ground beneath you seems rocky and unsteady, if storm clouds are gathering or the wind is blowing the rain sideways, I want to encourage you with some words from scripture, as well as some tips I’ve learned that have helped me over the years.  It is my hope and prayer that these will help you transition through tough times, until your harvest comes or the sun shines again.

“Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. The rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, but it won’t collapse because it is built on the Rock.” ~ Matthew 7:24-25 

“He reached down from Heaven and rescued me; He drew me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemies, from those who hated and were too strong for me. They attacked me at a moment when I was in distress, but the Lord supported me. He led me to a place of safety because He delights in me.” ~ Psalm 18:16-19   

“You light a lamp for me. The Lord, my God, lights up my darkness”

~ Psalm 18:28

“It is God who arms me with strength and keeps my way secure. He makes my feet like that of a deer so I can stand steady on high ground.”  ~ 2 Sam 22:33-34 

“They are like trees planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season. Their leaves never wither, and they prosper in all they do” ~ Psalm 1:3

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” ~ Galatians 6:9 

“But He never left them without evidence of himself and his goodness. For instance, He sends you rain and good crops and gives you food and joyful hearts.” ~ Acts 14:17

“Your threshing season will overlap with the grape harvest, and your grape harvest will overlap with the season of planting grain. You will eat your fill and live securely in your own land.”

~ Leviticus 26:5 

Further, these are some of the practical things I do routinely in seasons of change, stress, sadness or overwhelm.  You may add activities that work for you, but here are some helpful tips that can get your own ideas flowing:

1. Limiting noise, even the chatter of other people’s conversations that are around. If able, I retreat to a secluded place. Anywhere that I can step away and close the door to extraneous sounds and activities is helpful. If I have my Bible or a devotional book nearby, I read it.
2. Get outdoors. Go for short walks during breaks at work or home. The fresh air helps clear the mind, and the gentle exercise helps ease restless anxiety. And it doesn’t always have to be walking. It could be stretching, gardening, watering plants, or pulling weeds (there’s something about digging in the dirt that is calming and restorative).
3. When alone, or even when seclusion isn’t possible, I can settle myself by closing my eyes (not while driving, please) and talking to the Lord. Focusing on Him and His goodness, remembering all He’s brought me through, thanking Him no matter what…for the good and the bad…and there is always something good to be thankful for.
4. I like to sing hymns or worship songs, either out loud or quietly to myself. It centers my thoughts on the truth of God’s goodness and His nearness, in a soothing and relaxing way while pushing chaotic thoughts and emotions aside.
5. Just breathe. Deep relaxing breaths, slowly in and slowly out.
6. Add to this list your own proven ways that help you transition through difficult times.

If we allow ourselves, we can weather, endure, and even embrace the various seasons life sends and transitions us through. It’s not always easy and no one promised it would be. But in light of eternity: “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” ~ Galatians 6:9                                                                                                                                           

“There shall be showers of blessing: This is the promise of love; there shall be seasons refreshing, sent from the Savior above. Showers of blessing, showers of blessing we need. Mercy drops ‘round us are falling, but for the showers we plead.”

~ There Shall Be Showers of Blessing

Baptist Hymnal 1956