Peace

Unto Us

1 Comment / Christmas, Joy, Peace / /

“For unto us a Child is born, unto us a Son is given; and the government shall be upon His shoulder, and His name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” (Isaiah 9:6 ESV) “The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us; we have seen His glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.” (John 1:14 ESV) Jesus. My Savior. My LORD. My King. There aren’t enough words in the English language to convey what Jesus means to me. He entered this fallen world as a baby with His eyes fixed on the cross. God wrapped in human flesh. The very thought overwhelms me. He came as a servant, born in a barn, with a feeding trough in which to lay His head. He grew up a carpenter but all the while knowing His greatest purpose lie ahead. He was sinless as He walked this earth; both fully God and fully man. He willingly laid down His life so mine could be eternally saved. He took my punishment and, in return, has clothed me in His righteousness. Something I could not earn nor do I even deserve. What an amazing and incomprehensible love He has lavished upon me. How do I even begin to say thank you? He is constant, faithful, and true. Even when I am not. I am overwhelmed by His infinite mercy and amazing grace. I love Christmas. Although Jesus was most likely born in the Spring, we celebrate His birth at Christmas. To me, the timeframe doesn’t matter as much because I celebrate His birth every single day! A few weeks ago, my daughter shared a Facebook post with me she had seen in her feed. In it were facts surrounding the birth of Jesus I had never heard before. Reading the words just reaffirmed my belief that God is very much in the details. The Manger Lamb ~ by Brent Hanson God is in the details. Amazingly so! A manger is a feed trough and in ancient Israel, and still in the Middle East, they’re made of stone. If needed, they can be a protective basinet, and they were. The priests of Bethlehem would place certain lambs in them. Not all lambs; just those that were without blemish and suitable for sacrifice, for the sins of the people. These were the lambs Bethlehem was known for. Near the hills, there was a tower name “Migdal Eder” and the flocks near there produced lambs specifically for sacrifice. When the time neared, priests chose male lambs for sacrifice, those without blemish. To protect the lamb for sacrifice, a priest would wrap the lamb snuggly in cloth. Then he’d lay the swaddled lamb in a stone manger until the time came. The word “manger” is mentioned once in the account of Jesus’ birth (in Luke). Now all of the above details should make sense to you. However, on that night long ago, there was only a small group of people who would understand its significance. Those who heard the words, “You will find a baby wrapped in swaddling cloth, and lying in a manger.” The shepherds! The Bethlehem shepherds of the sacrificial flock. These shepherds knew what the swaddling cloth and manger meant. “This will be a sign unto you,” the angel said. And it was. It wouldn’t have been a sign to many. But to those shepherds, most definitely! This one detail is staggering. The long awaited Messiah wasn’t born to a king’s palace. No, the “Lamb of God” was found swaddled in a stone manger, destined for sacrifice. “Peace on earth and mercy mild, God and sinners, reconciled.” ~ Luke 2:11-14 (KJV) ~ “For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.” I have read the account of Jesus’ birth in the gospel of Luke my entire life and, until now, have never known the significance of the words spoken by the angel. I just took them at face value because God’s word is inerrant and Jesus was, indeed, found in a manger by the shepherds. But it’s so much deeper than that. Never again will I read about the birth of Jesus in the same way. God has revealed just a little bit more of who He is and how much He loves and I am undone. I am so thankful God is in the details. Jesus, the unblemished Lamb of God, wrapped in swaddling cloth, laid in a manger, born for sacrifice. I am so thankful God sent His one and only Son… Unto us.

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Satisfaction Guaranteed

Leave a Comment / Healing, Hope, Peace, Relationship / /

I have been reflecting. Before Tami and I started this online ministry, I had a previous website I started in June of 2015. I had been thinking about having it deleted since I no longer use it and, more importantly, the writings on that site cover the exact time span as the last two and a half years of my marriage. I felt the site had become irrelevant as all the content is from the past and there’s no sense dwelling on what used to be. Especially now that my life is the complete opposite from my existence back then. However, I haven’t had time to pursue that thought any further and I’ve recently learned why. For the past week or so, I have felt compelled by the Spirit to go back to that previous site and read the content posted there. I really didn’t understand the reason for delving into writings from the past, but I have learned to be obedient without asking questions so I did as He asked. There was definitely a reason for the delay in my hasty thought to erase the past. As I’ve said many times in the past, I do not believe in coincidence. I believe God is in control of what happens in my life and His timing is perfect. I believe every event that has transpired in my life thus far, is by design. Every single situation He allows to touch my life has been filtered through His loving hand first. And since I believe He’s in control of it, I know He’ll see me through it. With that being said, I haven’t had the chance to read all of the posts yet but the few I’ve managed to get to, have been very telling. The woman I found myself reading about was constantly worried, an impulsive buyer, used “retail therapy” as a means of coping, an obsessive planner, depressed, anxious, and fearful. Writing after writing told of weak faith, even weaker trust, a bad attitude, and a constant, overwhelming feeling of dread. As I read, I almost started to feel sorry for the person I used to be but then I realized the reason for the reflection. All those previous posts have shown me how very far God has brought me since those days. I am a completely different person today and it’s all because God allowed and used a heart-wrenching, painful event to show me who He is! The myriad of situations I wrote about, complete with all the traits above, were but a training ground to prepare me for the past four years. What God has done in my heart since 2015, is nothing short of a miracle. I used to have a serious obsession with purses. It didn’t matter how many I had in my closet, I rationalized each impulsive purchase with the reasoning I could always use a new one. I would go to the mall and not even be thinking about buying a new one and yet, when I’d walk by the department store Michael Kors or Kate Spade handbag section, it was as if I could hear them calling to me. “Buy me! Buy me! Buy me!” Without fail, I’d find myself at the check out counter, handing my credit card over to the sales associate. Once I got home, I immediately switched all the contents from my perfectly good current purse, to the new one. Oh, and it looked so good. I loved the smell of new leather and, most importantly, the way it made me feel. But you know what? After awhile, the new wore off, the smell of the leather grew faint, and it no longer made me feel happy. The new purse I just had to have, had lost its appeal. Then the next time I’d go to the mall, I’d end up at the same department store handbag section, checking out with the next handbag I just couldn’t live without. It was an endless, vicious cycle, and I was trapped in it. I realize now, I was trapped in that cycle because I was completely empty. I had Jesus, yes, but, at that time, the priorities I’d set for where He stood in my life were completely out of line. It’s painful to admit but my ex-spouse held the highest priority in my heart during our marriage. He came before anything and anyone, to include Jesus and my children. He was an idol, but that’s a subject for another time. When our relationship started to change and he was spending less time at home and more time traveling, I began to search for something to fill the void his absence left. Instead of running full speed into the arms of Jesus, I ran full speed into the arms of retail therapy and very expensive designer handbags. I looked for each new purchase to somehow, miraculously, fill the void in my heart and heal the deep longing in my soul. They did not. The only thing I received from those impulsive shopping sprees was credit card debt, a closet full of empty handbags, and an even emptier heart. God created all of us with an empty space that only He can fill; that only He can satisfy. However, He also created us with a free will so it’s up to us to either choose Him to fill that longing or look for other things to take His place. Things of this would are temporal and do not satisfy and yet, worldly pleasures and indulgences seem to be what most are after. To include me. King Solomon described this as “chasing after the wind.” (Ecclesiastes 1). We have an adversary, the devil, who uses every opportunity to distract and lead us away from God. More often than not, it was quite easy for him to distract me with the simple whiff of new leather. He knew my weakness and used it against me. In John chapter 4, we find the story

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In Pursuit of HappyNess

1 Comment / Encouragement, Healing, Joy, Peace / /

I don’t make new years resolutions. I haven’t for quite a few years. The reason for it, in my estimation, is that resolutions don’t work. In years past, I would make resolutions, promises if you will, that went something like… “This is the year I’m going to lose weight! This is the year I’m going to exercise more! This is the year I’m going to take more time off from work! This is the year I’m going to take more time for me!” On and on and on. And what always, inevitably, happened is I’d fail to keep up the routine and I’d beat myself up for months after because I couldn’t stick to it. Best laid plans and all that. Now, don’t get me wrong. All of the goals I mentioned above are good ones. I do need to do all of those things. I realize that more and more as I continue to grow older. I do intend to incorporate them into my life whenever I can. However, I don’t want to be controlled by them. I spent many years being controlled by another. No matter what I did, it was never good enough. Even when I worked out every single day, for three hours at a time, and maintained a size 2 body by starving myself…it was never enough. Nothing I did was ever good enough, done long enough, or even wise enough. For the past few days, I’ve had a song going through my head. It’s one I used to sing years ago at our church in Alaska. In fact, it was so long ago I couldn’t even remember the title to it until I googled some of the words. When the Time Comes by David Kavich Cleanse me Lord, Of all my silly, sad charades How I want to be all and only Yours Take away the clutter in my life everyday And make me like a child at play Give me joy I love to laugh and cry with You You’ve become a Friend with me all the time Help me to be patient as I watch and as I pray Growing in Your love each day Lord, show me the way. Fill me, Lord I want Your love to overflow Running free through me to a lonely world Let me share that simple truth that sets people free How I want them all to see, how it can be. When the time comes, I wanna be ready When Jesus comes to take me Take me home. In and of themselves, making plans and having goals are not bad things, but if they become the only thing we’re focused on and/or allow them to consume our every waking moment, then we’ve clearly lost sight of what’s most important. During my marriage, I was completely obsessed with being, doing, and becoming every single thing my ex wanted me to be, do, and become. It got so bad that if I had a weak moment and had the audacity to eat a candy bar, I would stuff the wrapper inside a soda can and hide it in the garbage because I didn’t want him to find it. I didn’t want to be ridiculed or chastised over it. I tired not to let him see me eat anything that could be deemed unhealthy. It’s the only thing I focused all of my energy on. This was not just a goal I wanted to achieve eventually. This was an every single day goal that I felt had to be achieved every single day! I felt I had no other choice. I had to keep him happy to be accepted. I had to keep him happy to be loved. I had to keep him happy so he’d stay. A lot of good it all did. He left anyway. I believe that’s why this song has been trapped in my mind the past few days and I’m so thankful it has. Perhaps the Spirit brought these words to mind so I’d, once again, realize the importance of keeping Him first in my life. To know that whatever I do to try to keep another happy is in vain. Jesus is the only One who can satisfy and fill the deep longing in our hearts. To remember I’m a just a sinner saved by grace and that I need to be ever mindful of any sin that may creep in and immediately confess it when convicted by the Holy Spirit. To stay true to the desire of my heart to be an example of Jesus to all those I come into contact with and to all those who read the words I write. Knowing Jesus is the greatest and most amazing privilege of my life and I long for others to know Him as I do. Often times, life gets so busy and we get caught up with all the things we have to do or even be. The enemy loves nothing more than keeping us distracted by all the things we allow to clutter up our lives. His goal is to get us to take our eyes off of Jesus. He doesn’t care what it is. Even if the things in our lives are good for us. Even good things can become bad if given the wrong priority. I posted a new scripture on the website a few days ago. It’s from a devotion I read this week and it was exactly what I needed. “There are many who say, “Who will show us some good? Lift up the light of Your face upon us, O LORD!” You have put more joy in my heart than they have when their grain and wine abound. In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for You alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety.” ~ Psalm 4:6-8 ESV Unfortunately, the world view is me, me, me, mine, mine, mine. In this passage of scripture above, King David is referring to those who

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Something of Value

1 Comment / Encouragement, Healing, Hope, Peace, Renewal / /

He said I had no value.  “Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?”   ~ Matthew 6:26 ESV What does it mean to value something or have values about something? I think it would depend on the object or objects in question. Wouldn’t you? I looked up both words: value/values. Each returned the same exact results. The word value(s) has several meanings. the monetary worth of something. a fair return or equivalent in goods, services, or money exchanged. relative worth or importance. the relative duration of a musical note. relative lightness or darkness of a color. However, let’s say you’re defining the value of another person in your life. What does it mean to value your spouse, your children, or a dear friend? I scrolled down a little further on the definition for both forms of the word and here’s what I found. something intrinsically valuable or desirable. to rate or scale in usefulness, importance, or general worth. So, to value someone means to see their usefulness, importance, worth, or something to be desired. Seems easy enough. What if, for example, you were told by someone close to you, such as your spouse, your child, or a friend, that you had no value? That you weren’t useful to them or important, or held worth? I would think learning that would be pretty devastating. What if you overheard it from a conversation you shouldn’t have been privy to but couldn’t un-hear it once you heard the words spoken? How do you live with that? I would imagine it would be very difficult to recover from that. Especially if you didn’t want the other person to know you accidentally overheard their conversation, for fear of retribution. That would mean you’d have to pretend you didn’t know anything and you’d have to ensure you didn’t act any differently for fear of giving yourself away. You’d have to push your emotions down and not let them affect you. And yet, you’d have to continue to live day after day, week after week, month after month, and year after year knowing the true feelings of the other person. Sounds pretty convoluted, doesn’t it? It was. Welcome to just one of the many scenarios I endured while married to my ex. We were married just shy of 35 years and I dealt with situations like the one above, at least, two or three times a week. There was always drama. Whether it was work related or health related or even yard work related. There was always something. I constantly walked on egg shells. He probably didn’t notice it because I became very good at hiding my feelings from him and besides, who notices someone of no value. As a child, I always looked forward to Christmas. My daddy was a cabinet builder by trade and, even though he worked hard, money was always tight. We lived in a 742 square foot, two-bedroom house on 28th Avenue. My two sisters and I shared a bedroom. We were crowded but it never seemed to bother us. We were thankful for what we had. I’m sure we were considered poor folks but I never felt poor. Christmas was the one day out of the year we received toys. I believe I was around 7 years old when I unwrapped her. A sweet little baby doll, complete with a fuzzy pink blanket and a bottle. I was so happy when I saw her all tucked into her little box. Since I didn’t have anything to make a little bed out of, I used the box she came in. After all, she fit into it perfectly because it was made just for her. I named her Joy. I don’t recall now why I decided on that name. Probably because having her as my own brought me such great joy. I took her everywhere with me. I’m sure to others, she looked like an ordinary doll but to me, she was one of a kind. She was the only doll I had so Joy was something of great value. When I was in the fourth grade, my mom gave birth to my little brother. Having four kids in a two-bedroom house became much too crowded so we moved to Oregon to live next to my grandparents. My Pappy had bought a big tract of land and then each one of my mom’s siblings purchased what they wanted. My parents purchased a used single-wide mobile home and had it moved onto the Sager section of the parceled out land. There were two bedrooms in the trailer. My oldest sister got one of the rooms to herself and my younger sister and I shared. My dad removed the tilt out portion on the trailer then added on a big living room, a master bedroom, and a laundry room to expand the living space. It was the biggest home I’d ever lived in. I thought we’d won the lottery or something. I started fifth grade the next school year. We lived out in the country so we rode the bus to and from school every day. My grandma built a shed by the main road so we would have shelter in case it rained. It was the Pacific Northwest. Rain was a given. Every morning, my sisters and I would walk up the hill and wait beside the gravel country road for the big yellow bus to pull up. The bus route took about an hour to get around to all the houses where the country kids lived. I remember the Thompson kids always smelled like they needed baths and you always knew what the Kelly kids had eaten for breakfast. I guess it’s not a bad thing to get on the school bus smelling like bacon. Funny the things we remember from childhood, isn’t it? What I remember most about

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Surrendered Silence

1 Comment / Encouragement, Healing, Peace, Relationship / /

Have you ever looked up the definition to the word noise? I know. It’s an odd question. I imagine you’re probably wondering why I would ask such a random question and why in the world would you ever need to look up the meaning of a word that is somewhat self-explanatory. Everyone knows what noise is, right? However, I was curious to see how the dictionary defines it. I was also curious to learn what other words could possibly be used to describe a word that, pretty much, describes itself. So, I looked it up and, after once reading it, I knew I had found the one definition that had described the word perfectly. “Noise: incomprehensibility resulting from irrelevant information or meaningless facts or remarks”. Now, why the quest to know the dictionary meaning of this word? It wasn’t just to know a random bit of information nor was it because I was simply intrigued by it. I wanted to learn its definition because the enemy has been using it as a weapon in his arsenal against me. It’s what the enemy has had me focused on to consume my mind. And he was succeeding. He was filling my thoughts with irrelevant information and meaningless facts until I could no longer comprehend anything! And, worst of all, it had started to drown out the still, small voice of my Savior. Which is exactly what he wanted. Noise. Noise. Noise! When I joined the social media platform, Telegram, it was so I could keep up with the goings-on in the world but maintain distance from the main stream media, as I do not trust them nor do I believe one word of the news they report. I had joined several Telegram channels to follow, most of which reported news from a Godly perspective. There were others I followed just because they were sources I knew to be trust-worthy. Although these channels put out truthful information, after several days in a row of reading them over and over, all of it had become too much. I knew I had to delete several channels so as not to continue to overwhelm my mind. So, one morning, I did just that. My mind had become like that of a pin-ball machine. I was allowing it to be filled with so much information and so many different voices, I was pinging from one opinion to the next until it felt as if I were spinning. I’m sure the enemy was laughing at me because he most definitely had me caught up in a whirlwind of information that had just become noise. In and of itself, information is not a bad thing. We need to be informed of what is happening in our world but not so much that it becomes all consuming as it can easily become a weapon in the enemy’s hand. Later that same day, I was listening to His Glory Ministries on YouTube. They were discussing the importance of taking time each day to read God’s word and pray. And while I know having quiet time is basically “Christianity 101” for every day life as a Christ-follower, why is it spending dedicated time with Jesus is what takes the backseat? When I wake up, why is it once my feet touch the floor, life takes over and things start to take precedence over basking in my Savior’s presence? Realizing my choice was the only obstacle standing between me and my soul’s longing for time with my Savior, I chose to remove the obstacle. I chose Him. That night, I went to sleep with a divine appointment on my calendar. I had purposed in my heart that when I woke up, instead of my usual “Thank You for a new day” prayer, I was going to spend some one-on-one time with Jesus. What happened the next morning, was not on my calendar. I woke up before my alarm went off! That never happens! I think Jesus was just as excited as I was to start the day together!  I always pray throughout the day but I knew this time was going to be special. My heart felt eager and hungry. I wanted to hear from Him. My overwhelmed, restless heart and mind needed a word from the Word Himself! If you’ve followed this ministry for any length of time, you know I grew up in church. And, having done so, I recall hearing over and over, “Every good Christian starts their day with quiet time.” So, I did my best to be a good follower. I did my best to follow the plan. If that’s what I was supposed to do, I wanted to be sure to do it. But it always felt as if I’d been guilted into doing it. Like it was just something I had to do to prove myself. But who was I proving myself to? It’s probably why the myriad of quiet times I started over the years, ended just as quickly. But this time was different. I didn’t feel guilted into it and I wasn’t out to prove anything to anyone. There was no agenda on my part. Nope. This time was completely different. I have an old, broken down, comfy chair, with no legs, in the corner of my room that I’ve had for years. It’s the kind of chair you sink into when you sit down. It’s the kind of chair you want to curl up in on a cold, rainy day, with a cup of hot coffee while watching the rain drip slowly from the eaves of the house. It’s the kind of chair that somehow knows your secrets but would never betray you by telling them to anyone. It’s the kind of chair that captured many tears at the end of a very long day. It’s the kind of chair you crawl into while processing the excruciating pain of rejection, heartbreak, and a painful divorce you didn’t want. It’s the kind of chair you go to because you associate it

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A Different Direction

Leave a Comment / Encouragement, Hope, Peace / /

Have you ever taken a detour? In December of 2019, my son and I were driving home from Destin, Florida after having spent Christmas there as a family. It’s a pretty long drive back to Alabama and when traffic comes to a complete halt, it’s easy to get frustrated and irritable sitting there, especially when you’re tired and just want to get home. After sitting still for what seemed like hours (I’m sure it had only been minutes), I noticed several cars passing to the right of me. I mentioned to my son those must be getting off the Interstate at the next exit to detour around what had brought us to a standstill. Having said that, I eased over into the right lane then proceeded to follow the rest of the cars to the next exit. My son was upset and wanted me to stay on the Interstate and just wait it out. However, I knew something he did not. I had programmed our home address into the GPS before leaving Florida. Even though we were back in Alabama and knew the way home from where we’d been stopped, I left it on just in case something like this happened. I had been in similar situations before and I knew the GPS would eventually re-route us back onto the right path to get us home. My son doesn’t like sudden changes from the known path and he very clearly voiced his fear with my choice of doing so. After listening to him protest for several minutes, I turned to him and said, “I understand your fear and know you don’t like last minute change but you’re going to have to trust me. I know what I’m doing and we’ll be okay. God will see us safely home.” Sudden or unexpected change can rock your world. If you’re a planner, you like your plan and know exactly how everything needs to go in order for that plan to work out. I know that to be true because I was the same way. I had a plan. Once. As a little girl, I used to play dress up in my mom’s clothes. Most of the time, I pretended to be a beautiful princess locked up in a castle, waiting for the handsome knight on a white horse to come rescue me. He would face the enemy holding me captive and once my foe was defeated, my handsome knight would come to the tower, sweep me up into his arms, and carry me away to live happily ever after. As I grew older, reality took the place of the knight and instead, I dreamed of a Christian man who just wanted to share life with me. One who cherished me. It’s all I ever wanted. I never dreamed of having a career or making lots of money. I only wanted to be married and have kids. That was my plan. Turns out, my plan for the long term didn’t exactly match God’s. His was quite different from mine. He was privy to details I knew nothing about. And, much like my son’s fearful protests about my detour off the Interstate, I spouted a few fearful protests when the life I’d known for three decades, suddenly took a detour of its own. But after listening to my protests, the Father whispered to me and said, “I understand your fear and know you don’t like last minute change but you’re going to have to trust Me. I know what I’m doing and you’ll be okay. I will see you safely home.” As I sit here reflecting back on the past three years, I’ve come to realize that what I thought was a sudden, last minute change, clearly was not. God had been preparing me, as well as covering me, for a very long time, even though I wasn’t aware of it. It seemed very sudden when it happened but, had I seen it from God’s perspective, I would’ve known He had been working on my behalf for years and everything had just fallen into place. When our lives detour from the path we thought we were on, it can be scary. Let’s face it. It can be earth shattering and sometimes, even heart-wrenching. When we realize the life plan we’d dreamed of and, perhaps even carefully thought out, suddenly ends, it’s difficult to come to terms with. Then the never-ending questions come and the heart-wrenching struggle to wrap your mind around what just happened, ensues. God created all of us with a free will to choose our own path in life. When you’re married, surely you believe the path you and your spouse are walking together will go in the same direction. But, unfortunately, that isn’t always the case. I do not believe God made me suffer the pain of infidelity and divorce. It was the end result of my former spouse’s life choices. I know God knew it would happen and He knew it would be a devastating loss in my life but I also know, He allowed it to happen because He loves me. Yes, you read that right. I didn’t understand it at the time but I see it all so clearly now. God is the Alpha and the Omega. He’s the beginning and the end. He sees the beginning and the end and everything that happens in between. He is Jehovah-El Roi, the God who sees. We never know what will be birthed from the situations and seasons that bring with them intense suffering, but that is when we have to keep our eyes on our Father and trust His heart. We must have faith. “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” ~ Hebrews 11:1 ESV This means no matter what we can see with our physical eyes, we believe and know God is at work in the unknown and will keep His word and His promises. We either trust Him

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To Encourage You ~ Psalm 91

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I woke up this morning with Psalm 91 on my heart. Such beautiful words penned by David of how God is our Refuge and Fortress. When I think of a fortress, I picture a city or a town with a big wall built around it to keep those within, from being attacked by the enemy without. I’ve lived on several military installations over the years and built around every single one is a wall to keep those within safe from all who are not allowed to be there. That’s exactly what our God is to us as His children. He is our Fortress. He puts a wall of protection around us, if you will, and He is not susceptible to outside influence or disturbance! He is our Defender and Protector! We can run to Him and hide and He will faithfully shelter us. That brings such comfort to my heart this day! With all the evil being exposed in our country and around the world, I am comforted by the promise of Almighty God that He will shelter and protect us from harm. He is in control and He sees and knows all! He will not allow the wicked to go unpunished but He also has His own timing. His ways are not our ways nor are His thoughts our thoughts. (Isaiah 55:9) We have to trust Him. We must have faith. “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1 NASB “And without faith, it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him.” ~ Hebrews 11:6 NASB My prayer this day is that you’ll be encouraged and know that you know that you know Almighty God is in control. He is “our Refuge and our Strength; a very present help in trouble.” Psalm 46:1 May these words from Psalm 91, bring you comfort and strength this day. “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress; my God, in whom I trust.” For He will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with His pinions, and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness is a shield and buckler. You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. You will only look with your eyes and see the recompense of the wicked. Because you have made the Lord your dwelling place, the Most High who is my refuge, no evil shall be allowed to befall you, no plague come near your tent. For He will command His angels concerning you, to guard you in all your ways. On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone. You will tread on the lion and the adder, the young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot. “Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him; I will protect him, because he knows My name. When he calls to Me, I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will rescue him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him My salvation.” ~ Psalm 91 ESV

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“Keep Your Eyes on Me”

Leave a Comment / Encouragement, Hope, Peace, Relationship / /

Have you ever allowed fear to control you? Fear is a very powerful emotion. It causes panic and impulsive decisions. It usually strikes when we least expect it and comes with a rush of adrenaline that makes us want to run for our lives. Ever experienced that? If you answered in the affirmative, you’re definitely not alone. I, too, can raise my hand in agreement. While fear is a very powerful emotion, it does not come from God. The words “fear not” are used 365 times in the Bible. Do you think it’s the desire of God’s heart that His children not live in fear? I would say it’s pretty obvious. 1 Kings 18 & 19, tell the story of Elijah, a mighty prophet of God, who allowed one woman’s threat to make him run in fear for his life. God had just used Elijah to slaughter 450 false prophets of Baal and 400 false prophets of Asherah by calling down fire from heaven. The King’s wife, Jezebel, was angry and vowed to kill Elijah as he had killed her false prophets. When this word reached Elijah, he allowed one thought from his enemy to control his next move. “Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it, and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep.” ~ 1 Kings 19:3-5 NIV Elijah was afraid, worn out, frustrated, and wanted to give up. He actually asked God to let him die right then and there. Ever been there? Have you ever been so tried of waiting or weary from grief, heartache, or bad news that you just wanted it to end? I know I have. Elijah was no different. He was every bit a human just like us. And he was weary. All at once an angel touched him and said, “Get up and eat.” He looked around, and there by his head was some bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again. The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.” So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God. There he went into a cave and spent the night.” ~ 1 Kings 19:6-9 NIV Now, I’ve never been awakened from a nap by the touch of an angel, that I know of, nor has bread and water appeared on my nightstand (which is completely possible) but I understand and relate to Elijah’s feelings. I fought long and hard for my marriage. I spent countless hours on my knees in prayer for my former spouse and nothing ever changed. I went out of my way to do things to make him happy and, quite often, in ways that made me feel ashamed.  All of it a desperate attempt to make him love me. At one time, I had even convinced him to go to counseling, thinking it would heal whatever it was I couldn’t accomplish on my own. It was all in vain. He went to one session and quit. And yet, I continued to fight. I was so convinced there was something I hadn’t tried or some magic words I hadn’t said to win him back. It wasn’t until he looked me in the eye and said, “I’m not willing”, did I accept defeat. It was then I realized it didn’t matter what I had done or what I was doing, I couldn’t make him choose me. I was heartbroken, scared, frustrated, and voiced my disappointment to God, just as Elijah did. Why did I have to spend all those years fighting for a man and a marriage that was doomed from the beginning? What was the point? I was weary, exhausted, and wanted to lay down and die. Then God took me into the wilderness. The following conversation God had with Elijah, reminds me of a few God has had with me. And the word of the Lord came to him: “What are you doing here, Elijah?” He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, torn down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.” The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.” Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.”  ~ 1 Kings 19:10-13 NIV  Often times, we expect God to do this huge, dramatic gesture in our lives because He’s God, right? Or we wait for Him to severely punish us for being weak or for questioning why something heart-wrenching happened to us, or for having a pity party. But God meets us right in the middle of where we are. And, I have found, He doesn’t ever shout. He comes in a whisper. Oh, how the quiet presence of my Father is accompanied by this amazing power to take possession of my heart all over again!  How many times have I expected God to chastise me over some impulsive decision I made out of fear or when I dared voice my discouragement to Him and yet, He completely captivates me,

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The First of Many

4 Comments / Encouragement, Healing, Hope, Peace / /

“Therefore I urge you, brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies [dedicating all of yourselves, set apart] as a living sacrifice, holy and well-pleasing to God, which is your rational (logical, intelligent) act of worship.  And do not be conformed to this world [any longer with its superficial values and customs], but be transformed and progressively changed [as you mature spiritually] by the renewing of your mind [focusing on Godly values and ethical attitudes], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His plan and purpose for you].” ~ Romans 12:1&2 AMP Have you ever been stuck in a pattern of thought or worry that you knew was not healthy nor productive yet you just couldn’t seem to break free from it? God’s word tells us not to be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of our mind. For a very long time, I didn’t completely understand what that meant and worse yet, had no idea how to do it even if I had understood its meaning. Healing from grief and heartache is a process. Choices are made, whether by us or by others, that effect our lives and ultimately, our minds. The actions of others may hurt or wound us in the moment but in the aftermath, our minds take over. Sometimes we accept denial as a defense mechanism against the pain or, as was my case, believe the lies the enemy plants and then plummet into depression. Either way, we are imprisoned. God tells us to stop imitating the pattern and ideals of this world then choose to allow the Holy Spirit to change our thoughts from the inside out. In other words, stop letting the world dictate how we think and how we act and instead, allow the Holy Spirit to completely reform our thinking with the intent of setting it back on the right path. The path of truth. God’s truth. Oh, how I hunger for more and more of God’s truth in my life! With that being said, the past three years have been filled with many “firsts” for me. Unexpected events that have caught me by surprise. Changes in my personal life, as well as the recent events in the the world, have effected the environment in me and around me. I always love being in my home because it’s my safe place away from the world but it’s the first time I’ve ever been quarantined and confined to it for 3 months straight. It’s the first time I’ve ever been separated from my kids and grandkids, knowing I couldn’t just get in my car and go see them whenever I wanted to. It’s the first time I’ve ever felt panic hang in the air like a fog. It’s the first time I’ve seen people with masks over their face, yet see such fear in their eyes. It’s the first time I’ve flown on an airplane that wasn’t filled to capacity. It’s the first time I’ve attended a wedding celebration where the bride and groom were told they were limited to the number of guests they could invite. It’s the first time I’ve ever experienced the uneasy feeling of realizing how quickly our freedom to choose could be taken away. It’s the first time I’d ever experienced the entire world changing at the same time. And it was isolating. So many firsts. So much change in such a short period of time. I have felt stuck. Stuck in a place out of my control and way out of my comfort zone. So many unknowns. So many questions. With no answers. Have you ever felt that way? The world, as a whole, is stuck. Imprisoned, if you will, and it grieves my heart. The world needs hope. The world needs healing. The world needs Jesus. With everything that’s happening all around us today, it’s growing more and more difficult to keep our minds focused on anything positive or hopeful. The news is so full of contradiction and we can’t believe what is being broadcast over the airwaves or posted on social media. So, what are we to believe? What is the truth? Better yet, where do we go to find the truth? In times past, my initial reaction to something unexpected happening in my life would’ve been to worry first then talk to God but only after realizing that worrying about situations out of my control doesn’t help. But now, whenever I have questions about anything that is happening in this world or in my life, I talk to God about it, first. God has shown me so many things about who He is and how much He cares about the things we care about. I am so thankful He’s never caught off-guard and is never surprised by the events that touch our lives. There’s a very special scripture the Spirit whispers to my heart whenever my mind starts to focus and dwell on things happening around me. It’s found in the New Testament book of Philippians and it says the following. “Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart].  The things which you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things [in daily life], and the God [who is the source] of peace and well-being will be with you.” ~ Philippians 4:8&9 AMP Such beautiful words that sound easy enough to do, right? However, these beautiful words come with a choice. A condition. A change in our thought pattern. Keep your thoughts continually fixed. That is the choice. We must choose to think on the authentic and real; the honorable and admirable; the beautiful

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Details, Details, Details

Leave a Comment / Healing, Hope, Peace / /

Have you ever had your car detailed? I have only had it done once, a very long time ago, but I was surprised at how everything that was chrome glistened and there didn’t seem to be a speck of dust anywhere. The only thing I noticed that was missing was the new car smell! (Why can’t they put that in the details?) I wanted it to stay that way forever but alas, it did not because you know, life happens! Before too much time had passed, my car was, once again, back to the way it had been before. Just as the person who worked on my car ensured that he didn’t leave one detail from missing the end of his cleaning instrument, God is that way with you and me. He wants to ensure He doesn’t leave one detail out so He can lead us on to our purpose but, alas, we tend to go back to wanting to be in control of our own lives…and before too much time has passed, we go back to the way we had been before. I do it all the time…and this past week was no exception. God is in the details. There is a tradition at some churches to  choose a word for the year to act as a theme for what you want to focus on in the new year.  For 2018, the year immediately following my divorce, I chose the word forward. It was truly the desire of my heart to move forward and leave all the pain and grief behind me. I was absolutely amazed at how God used that word to lead me into my new normal. I saw and heard that word everywhere! My daughter even made this picture for me to hang in my new house as a reminder of God’s provision and faithfulness. He constantly reminded me that He was leading me forward and had a specific and detailed plan for my life. 2018 was definitely the hardest year of my life, thus far, yet even in the times I felt like I’d taken a few steps back due to pain or grief, there was an Unseen Hand leading me forward. God is in the details. The word I chose for 2019 is Content. I made the choice to be content with all God has provided and to live within my means. I accumulated a lot of debt in the year following my divorce and, I will admit, some was of my own making. Retail therapy is not a wise choice when you’re grieving but it’s what I turned to, trying to relieve the agony I was feeling. (Side note: it. did. not. work. I was still in pain and had accumulated a bunch of stuff that, while it made my new home and yard look beautiful, I was left with credit card bills to pay.) The rest of it came as a result of my son’s college expenses (student loans), medical expenses, dental expenses, and, unfortunately, a huge tax bill. Unexpected things that you can’t really prepare for. Things that come up as you live life. In March of this year, I received word (through my kids) that their dad had lost his job. Up to this point, he had been paying alimony as part of our divorce settlement. Even though I had grown to depend on that income, my instincts kept telling me that it wouldn’t last long. Deep in my heart, I knew he would find some way to stop supporting me. I don’t know if it was the Holy Spirit forewarning me about it or if I just know my ex that well…perhaps it was a little of both. Once the alimony stopped, I actually felt peace. Yes…you read that word correctly. I experienced unexplainable peace. It was one of those “God things” that doesn’t quite make sense to our finite minds yet was very tangible. I was actually relieved. I no longer had anything keeping me tied to him. That, in and of itself, was freeing! Since that time, God has been showing me what it means to live day to day being content with Him being my Provision. He absolutely knows the debt I have. He absolutely knows whether or not my ex “lost his job” or if he just found another way to hurt me. It didn’t take long for the enemy to start messing with my peace. He cannot read our minds but he’s very observant and hears the words we speak aloud. After a few months of struggling with the debt load, I started listening to the enemy. As a result, I became angry that my ex seemed to be “winning”. So, I took matters into my own hands. I did not pray about it. I did not ask God what I should do. I just wanted my way. I wanted answers and I wanted them now. (Just being real and raw here.) I contacted my attorney to see if anything could be done about him not supporting me in some monetary way, since he signed a legally binding document. But, ya know what? I hit road blocks at every turn. In my anger and frustration, I cried out to God about all the injustices my ex was inflicting on me. Why, God? It isn’t fair that he’s getting everything he wanted! He just cast me aside and walked away so he could have his new life with his girlfriend! Why should he be allowed to get by with not supporting me with whatever income he has? I supported him for years and what thanks do I get? I was angry and I wanted God to know it. In my heart, I already knew He knew it but I am grateful He loves me so much that He allowed me to vent. He allowed me to whine. He allowed me to be angry and frustrated. After He patiently waited for me finish my temper-tantrum, and

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